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Reason to get out of bed

nVrl9dGToday’s post from the other blog.

I’ve rarely been one of those people who can’t wait to get out of bed in the morning. There was a time in my life that just merely waking up and realizing I had live another day would cause a sobbing fit. For me, most times, getting out of bed is an automatic function, not something I want to do but people expect me too and the bladder can be a harsh mistress. This is to say that there is very little I look forward to each day.

However, now I have three days to look forward to. Maybe not the whole day, I’m nowhere near that happy of a person, but at least a couple hours of it is worth getting out of bed for. And that’s when I am on the air.
I’ve wanted to be a media personality from a very young age. One of the first vocal impersonations I could do was Howard Cosell. I would record myself to see if I was getting any better, let’s just say there was no chance of me being famous for my Howard Cosell. I would also record myself being a reporter for the local news stations as well.
When middle school came along there was a summer enrichment program in television and radio production, I loved it even though I couldn’t juggle all the DJ equipment. It helped me chose a high school with a media program… where I spent practically all my four years on newspaper. I kind of gave up and forgot about it, not wanting to go into a career as a journalist.

Read more here.

 
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Posted by on April 5, 2014 in introspective

 

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Monday Help Out – Let the Music Play

Monday’s suck.  So help make them, and you, feel better by doing something for someone else.  I plan the Monday Help Out to be a weekly feature to boost the signal of people in need of assistance, financial or otherwise.  It can be an individual or group.  It doesn’t necessarily have to be a charity or people looking for crisis assistance.  It can fund an idea or a worthwhile project.  In other words people who could use some money thrown their way to help them move forward.

I commit to donating $5 (or the equivalent in items) to each organization mentioned in these features, I hope you can do the same.  Even $1 would be better than nothing and could mean a lot to someone else.  If nothing more than telling them that you see them and believe in them.

I called this week’s Monday Help Out, Let the Music Play because both of these are related to one of my passions, music.

Tacluda/RGBstock.com

Tacluda/RGBstock.com

On October 5th, my hometown, Louisville, was inundated with a lot of rain.  A record amount of rain causing flash flooding and regular flooding with many people suffering damage property and having to evacuate their homes.  If you are from Louisville then you knew someone who got some damage.

The person I knew was DJ Dali of KJSR.net.  I’ve never met DJ Dali in person but I’ve listened to her The Fantastic Voyage with DJ Dali and have talked her on live chat during other shows.  She’s good people and puts on a good show.

However, the flooding screwed her royally.  She lost her home, most of her belongings, and one of her pets.  She is currently unable to do Fantastic Voyage or her other show The Remedy due to these losses.  And that’s another tragedy.  DJ Dali could really use your help.  Please go here and donate if you can.  If you can’t help out with money than please help out by passing the link along.

Speaking of KJSR.net

KJSR.netKJSR.net may be only the #3 internet radio station in the world but it’s #1 in my heart.  Beside its eclectic collection of music and audio clips, everything from top 40 to old-time radio shows; their DJs are as varied as their audio library.  KJSR.net is not playing the same ten songs over and over again.  They just don’t play rock, or country, or dubstep; they play just about everything.  The DJs create the theme to their show and select their own music so you never know what you are going to get but it’s going to be interesting and good.

And they let me do a weekly movie review segment called Been Caught Streaming, currently on hiatus for a few weeks.

All this has been done for the last five years with volunteers and shoestring budget.  Which is why they accept donations.  There is no cost to listen to KJSR.net but you do have to register.  That’s because they don’t censor the music or the DJs there may be occasional profanity.  So take a listen and if you like what you hear then consider making a donation.

 
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Posted by on October 14, 2013 in Monday Help Out

 

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Today’s Theme Music – Creep

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by nickanizer via stock.xchng

So I wasn’t planning on doing a theme music today but this song apparently won’t stop repeating in my head until I do.  There is something about Radiohead’s Creep that has universal appeal. We’ve all felt like we don’t belong at some point and wished we were special.

I know part of this earworm is triggered by marketing.  I love to write, I still like doing graphic design, I love working for myself but I can’t market worth crap. Marketing requires finding what makes you special, I don’t think I’m very special.  There are things I do in my life some people find unique or different, or more often weird but to me it’s just normal.  To me my housing situation is normal, I’ve lived it for over 10 years now.  I think it’s normal to be a black girl who loves science fiction and fantasy; who dates outside of her race; who would rather watch horror than romance; who prefers pretty much any musical genre to rap (although I’ve been listening to an embarrassing amount of Spose, I think it’s because he’s funny).  But I know what I consider normal makes me an outcast, and outsider, a creep.  In a room full of people I feel that I don’t belong there.

There is a thin line between special and strange. Unfortunately most of the time society gets to choose which side you are on.  I wish I was special.

And now the funny part…

I think this would be a great song to strip to.  About everytime I hear this song I can almost imagine it.  I picture this heavily tattooed, maybe pierced, person (gender changes each time and is of no consequence, same with their body composition), they are exquisitely beautiful in a sense that mainstream society will never get.  And they are dancing their heart out on stage. I’m not really concerned how much clothing is removed, just the physical embodiment of this song.

I think I want to see that for my birthday next year.

Anyone buying?

 
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Posted by on August 15, 2013 in Music, Writing

 

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Today’s Theme Music – Kryptonite

Everyone has their Kryptonite, the one thing that they are powerless against and sometimes can even cripple them.  For some people it’s a certain food or drink, for others it can be a person that has them completely wrapped around their finger although interaction with them is always disastrous.  My Kryptonite is doubt.

Doubt is a sneaky little bastard.  Nothing consciously has to trigger it.  I can just be going about my day and out it slinks from some darkened corner to attack.  Suddenly it’s “Hi I’m your old pal doubt and everything you think and feel is wrong, or maybe it isn’t.  Thing is you don’t know which and one wrong move could be fatal.” Yes, it’s a bit overdramatic, but when doubt hits it doesn’t really pull punches.

This morning I woke up with doubt straddling my chest, weighing me down to the bed.  Or maybe it was just indigestion.  I had dinner at my mother’s yesterday and although she makes the best southern food my body is never equipped to handled the great influx of carbs, salt, and oil that come along with the great feast.  But I digress. Doubt got real comfy as I drifted in and out of consciousness, marking time by the local news program mumbling across the room and contemplating if I had enough energy to roll over and turn of the fan so my throat would stop hurt.  I doubted it would’ve helped anyway.

The first pang of doubt hit, it was a simple one.  I’m not going to complete my goal of Camp Nanowrimo.  It’s the 22nd and I’m not going to be able to write 5,000+ words a day to get to 50,000 by the end of the month.  Too many things have come up and I’ve let it slide badly.  That wasn’t the doubt. That doubt was that I’ll ever reach that 50,000 word goal for Nano ever again.  It was kind of easy to dismiss.  July is much busier than November so I’ll try again then.

But doubt wasn’t letting go so easily.  It clamped down on my wrists as I began to lift off the bed.  “What if you just aren’t a writer anymore?” it purrs. It knows my weakness.  I doubt  a lot of things on a daily basis, I’ve come to terms with many. I doubt my looks, I doubt my popularity, I doubt my physical ability, I doubt people really love me.   They are but little pangs now, like the small aches and pains of getting older;  you aren’t happy with them but they become part of your day.

However I’m a storyteller, I need to tell people stories.  Since I always doubt that people are  really listening to me when I talk, I write.  If I can’t write I might as well not exist.  I didn’t write for a long time, I attempted to tell stories but really I felt like a ghost, invisible for years and years.

My productivity has declined greatly since it’s sudden reemergence a bit over a year ago.  The logical part of me says it’s just because I’ve added things to my life, but doubt is there to remind me that it may not be the case.  See doubt doesn’t have to prove it’s point, it just has to get you to question yours.

One would think that writing these simple words would be enough to dispel the monster of doubt but even now the whispers are still in my ears, swirling through my head; what if this entry is your last, what if the well of words has finally run dry…

 
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Posted by on July 22, 2013 in introspective, Music

 

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Today’s Theme Music – Together in Electric Dreams

By Hotblack via Morguefile.com

By Hotblack via Morguefile.com

I generally keep my theme music posts on the blogs facebook page but I decided to share this one to a much broader audience.  Up until a few months ago I hadn’t heard this song, but it’s usually the last song on a friend’s weekly radio program.  It’s curious sometimes how sometimes music has meaning for you the first time you hear it. Like with the song Fix You by Coldplay, I cried the first time I heard it.  But with Together in  Electric Dreams by Human League it took repeated listening before it got to me.

Used to be when you wanted to see a friend you would walk down a few doors or around the block.  Occasionally you would have to get on your bike or in an extreme case catch  the city bus.  Now I have friends I may could reach by phone but really the only practical way I can touch them is electronically.  I wasn’t an internet early adopter, I never used BBS or anything like that.  My first modem was a 14.4k and after spending over two hours downloading a browser didn’t really know where to go.  I was a lost babe in a pretty big freakin woods.  Finally I began to find websites of interest and enjoyed them but still it was like being in the Smithsonian after hours, incredibly interesting but coldly alone.

My character Caritas drawn by Tiltwolfe

My character Caritas drawn by Tiltwolfe

I think I first tried Instant Messaging because of meeting HB and Kitty.  They lived 80 miles away so that meant seeing them maybe once or twice a month.  HB is not a phone person by any stretch of the imagination so I was introduced to ICQ, I was freaking hooked.  Not only could I talk to him but I could talk to multiple people and to satisfy the quiet voiced introvert that I am, I didn’t have to be in the same room. I think Kitty introduced me to Livejournal, I’m always cloudy on details.  Livejournal gave me the opportunity to monologue, be understood, and get responses.  I still have an account, several in fact, but I don’t use them anymore.  Then HB introduced me to mucking and more specifically FurryMuck… okay I was overwhelmed a bit at that.  I can’t keep up with the scroll of twenty people talking at the same time, but I found out how to private message and to find, and if necessary build, secluded areas for private conversations.  I met quite a few friends after weeding out the creeps and pervs (apparently a catholic schoolgirl skunk is a big deal).  Two I remember fondly was a guy from Sweden and another from South Africa.  At first our conversations were simply about differences between our countries, what was popular what was not. But it got to the point where I would stay up late just to say Good Morning to the one in South Africa before he went to work and helped count the days when the Swedish guy’s cat would be released from quarantine, (he moved to the UK six months into our friendship).  I still miss both of them terribly even though their names are lost to the swiss cheese that is my brain.  I was so upset I lost the photo the guy from South Africa sent me of the view of the ocean from his apartment high rise, it was the closest to South Africa I would ever get.

Upon learning my obsession with flashes of belly shots, she pinned this for me.

Upon learning my obsession with flashes of belly shots, she pinned this for me.

Now it’s facebook, tumblr, pinterest, twitter, etc., etc.  You never know where the next friendship or relationship will come from.  It’s not unusual for people to be committed to someone they have never and will never meet.  It’s not superficial game playing, despite what clueless media seems to think, there is a lot of deep connection over lines of electricity and waves of air.  Take for instance my Pinterest cohort.  Yes I managed to create a friendship from a pinning board.  We bonded somewhere between Supernatural and our mutual fangirling.  Sometimes our communication is simple pinning of eithers addictions, tagging it for the other to find.  Other times  we actually email each other and talk about fandoms, writing, and our  personal lives.  There is no way I would’ve ever met her in the flesh (I’m beginning to really hate the term real life) as she lives hundreds of miles away but electronically she’s just next door.

I’ve never counted but I’m pretty sure my electric friends outnumber my flesh friends.  I care about them all, celebrate their successes, laugh along with them, cry at their losses; having a friend across miles, mountains, oceans means nothing in the ‘verse can happen that you can’t feel affected by.  When there is a disaster you wonder who among the people you talk to, read, share photos, play games with may be affected.  The whole wide world becomes just a tad bit smaller and your arms, your heart a bit larger to engulf it.

 
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Posted by on July 19, 2013 in introspective, Music

 

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Video

Today’s earworm – I FINK U FREEKY

This is one of those songs that in the beginning you have no idea why you are listening to it, but by the end you know it’s going to be stuck in your head all day. Odd sounding lead vocalist and even odder imagery, what can I say, I think I love it. There is profanity so you have been warned.

 
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Posted by on January 23, 2013 in Music

 

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