200th post – All will be revealed*

12 Jun

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAWhen I started this blog on January 17th I wanted this to be a haven, for me mostly, for being yourself, no matter how left or right of norm you may be.  By sharing pieces of myself I wanted to encourage others to do the same.  And while I’ve wrote some personal stuff and shared my unabashed fangirling, the monster that is my movie obsession has taken over.  Once I catch up with those (hopefully by Sunday) that will change.  There will still be reviews a plenty of movies, tv shows and books, but also more of the other stuff as well.  I want you to get to know me so I can get to know you.

In that vein, for my 200th post (Yay!) all will be revealed about me (*okay not all but a whole super lot).  Now this serves two purposes 1. You get to know me and 2. Er um, it’s a bit of a fundraiser.  See I have two goals I want to acheive by the end of summer; to have as my domain name and to be a fulltime writer/freelance graphic designer.  I’m not the kind of person to ask for a handout, but if people want to support my efforts, that’s a completely different animal.  So interspersed through the facts will be links. And some of those links are affiliate based.  If you feel inclined to purchase something through those links that would be shiny. 🙂  If not that’s okay too.  No pressure.  Okay enough babbling, on to the sharing.:)

About me: Technically I’m an only child.  Not technically I’m the youngest of four. I share a mother with two siblings and a father with another. When I was younger I was completely ashamed about the fact my parents were never married and frequently lied and said that they were divorced. 

I was married once.  Never again. I wished to be pregnant but that will never happen.  This hurts more some days than others. I wanted one child, a girl. I would’ve named her Lily. Adoption is not an option due to financial issues and the fact that most agencies don’t like my household make-up.

My household includes Horseboy (HB) my partner of 13 years and Kitty, his other partner of 17 years and my hetero-life-mate (it’s a Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back reference).  We are also owned by four cats. No we are not Mormon, we are polyamorous. Yes, I do see others than HB but they probably won’t be mentioned in this blog for their privacy.

I suffer from both PCOS (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome) and depression.  After trial and multiple error I’ve made the choice to not be medicated for either; little to no benefit for the side effects I experienced. I’m not about to recommend this as a path for anyone, I can only say what works for me. I am clinically obese can’t say if that is because of the PCOS or if my obesity caused the PCOS.  Even if I were able to lose the weight I want to, at best I would be overweight.  I’m okay with that, I don’t frankly care if you’re not.

What I do: I am a freelance graphic designer, mostly book cover design, primarily through my Fiverr account. I love to write and am currently editing my first novel tentatively called A Tale of Broken. I write fanfiction as well, mostly in The Avengers movieverse. I have one piece of adultish fiction on Fiction Press as well. I used to take photos, but it’s all hobby now. I’m also a bit of a housefrau and gardener.

What I like: My favorite book is One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. Two of my favorite book series are The Hollows by Kim Harrison and the unfinished Parable series by Octavia Butler.  My favorite band will always probably be R.E.M.  My favorite song of theirs is Good Advices, favorite album, Fables of the Reconstruction.

I could eat shrimp, sushi, and pizza everyday.  My top three objects of fangirl obsession are Jeremy Renner, Pam Grier and Jason Statham.  Although, Joseph Gordon-Levitt is running a very close fourth.  I fall in love with guys and gals equally.  I just have better luck with guys. Brains and personality will always win over looks although those traits greatly improve the look of the total package.  Eyes are also a major factor.

Odd and not so odd facts: I have had a play I’ve written performed in Europe, Germany to be specific.  It was high school and our playwrights class got to go. I think it was a sister cities exchange or something.  It was for a high school group and my play wasn’t very good compared to the others.  I’ve had Belgian Waffles in Belgium.  Nothing I’ve eaten with that name back here in the states has come close to the taste and texture.

My senior prom, the poor unfortunate soul's face blurred for privacy.

My senior prom
The poor unfortunate soul’s face blurred for privacy.

I took a blind date to my prom.  Well not completely blind I did get to meet him the week before. I didn’t have my first boyfriend until I was 20.  Most people didn’t know about it until we were engaged when I was 26. I didn’t lose my virginity to him, that had been taken long ago.  I am a survivor of sexual abuse and rape. Like most victims I never reported it and it took almost a decade before I told anyone.  I’ve blocked most of the details out of my head and honestly wish I could erase it completely.  What it left me with is a crippled self esteem and random things that freak me out  for no reason.  I knew the perpetrators, luckily I haven’t seen them in few years. I’ve finally gotten to a point that I don’t want to rip their faces off, I’ve handed that over to karma; but I hope to never see them again.

Although I was raised Baptist I collect Buddhas.  I don’t currently practice any religion, finding them equally valid and invalid but the book Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse opened my mind to the possibilities and I’m drawn to the multiple images of the Buddha.


Part of my Derby Festival Pin collection.

I also collect Kentucky Derby Festival pins.  I love my hometown of Louisville and truly believe Kentucky Kicks Ass.  Honestly I love being sort of a southern girl (people debate all the time if KY is north or south).  My accent only really comes out when I’m upset but I’m fascinated with all the non-racist things about the south.  And yes there is plenty; manners and mannerism for one.  I do love a good country accent and I will chug good sweet tea like a champ. I love bluegrass music and secretly wish I could spend a good deal of time out in the rural areas and small towns.

My grandfather James Hairston circa 1972

My grandfather James Hairston circa 1972

What I want out of life: I want to be a semi-famous writer.  Enough to have fangirls/boys, not so famous that my life is complete consumed with press junkets.  I want to be a size that I can do the things I want to do, doesn’t matter if that’s a size 2 or 22.  I want to find my paternal grandfather, living or dead.  The last time I seen him I was a baby, there is a tiny hole in my heart reserved for him. I want to be a zombie extra in a movie, budget doesn’t matter.  I want to create the video that has been in my head since the first time I heard Life in a Northern Town by Dream Academy.  I want to have Joss Whedon as a mentor.  I want to donate my body to a body farm.  I want to have a group family and live on a sprawling property with multiple houses and connecting porches.

I want you to keep reading this blog

I want you to follow my hijinks on facebook.

I want you to love one another and most importantly yourself.

If you can’t love than like.

And if you can’t like at least don’t hate; there is enough ugliness in the world already.

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Posted by on June 12, 2013 in introspective


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